50/365 – #LetDad&MomKnow 

To Papa & Mama, I might not say and express fully how much I adore & love the both of you, but through my words you’ll know how much I do. 
The moment I opened up my life to my parents, everything felt lighter – like a huge sack of rice was lifted from my shoulder. I don’t have to hide anything from anyone; I don’t have to worry about telltales from big-mouthed neighbors.

Parents.. no matter how strict they are, no matter how annoying they are with their constant follow-up whenever you leave the house, no matter how irritating they become when they keep on repeating and repeating and repeating words of wisdom you already know and heard for the nth time – they deserve to know, you know. They’re strict like that because they are trying their very best to lead you to the right way. They bombard you with so many questions and assumptions because they simply care about you and what happens in your life. The only thing you can ever give back to those years they sacrificed caring and loving you the best way they can is to let them in your life. Trust me, they’re the best-est best friends you can ever have.

Let me tell you where it started. I had my first-somewhat-relationship when I was in 6th grade. I was the talk of town – new student feels, yeah. That was also when I started keeping things from my parents. They wouldn’t approve of it – I knew it. So it continued as I entered failed relationships after another. Don’t get me wrong, we’re legal. They know who it was and they got to meet everyone during the courtship. But the barrier remained. They would just see the guy once or twice and that was it. Maybe that was why my relationships kept on failing. But on some point somewhere, everything started changing. I would ask advice from my Dad when everything was so complicated or when my ex would throw tantrums at me for irrelevant reasons. Hey, my Dad’s one of the strictest and most disciplinarian Dads you would ever meet. He’s part of the watch-me-kill-the-guy-with-my-own-hands or i’m-watching-you-douchebag-so-you-better-be-careful Dad Club. Oh and my mom, oh my Mom’s the most sophisticated and mataray Mom you’d ever encounter. She’s so intimidating my exes worried about her approval more than my Dad’s. We connect to some stuff but we just fight over almost everything. Despite that, I was surprised when they gave great advices when I was opening up to them. Maybe it was also because we shared a deeper bond when we started attending The Feast that I got the courage to open up to them and they got the understanding and wisdom to relate and give me advices as they know best. To my surprise (again), I found myself crying to them when my ex broke up with me (in front of them).

Maybe your parents are not as understanding as mine is or your bond is not as close as we have – but these things will keep intact despite the differences:

1. Your parents know you best. 

Darling, your mom carried you on her mind since the day they thought of having you. Your dad knew how precious you are since the day he held you in his arms when you couldn’t even open your eyes. They. Know. You. Best. They know your worth more than anyone else. They know what you deserve to have and they’d sacrifice everything just for you to have it right in your hands. You may change overtime, but they would still know how beautiful you are inside and out. Keep that in mind. For a creator knows the true value of his creation.

2. Your parents know what’s best for you. 

Trust me. Even when sometimes what they make you do makes no sense AT ALL. You’re realize one day the purpose of everything they made you do. Parents feel everything. The moment you introduce someone to them, they know it beforehand if that guy would hurt you or not. You’ll know it through their actions – my mom wouldn’t talk to my ex even just for a little bit because she knew he would just hurt me (this was revealed after our almost 2-year relationship)

3. Your parents are your most dependable knights-in-shining armor.  

They will defend you against anyone. They will rescue you through anything – no matter how deep the damage is. They will fight with you side-by-side. Even when it is your fault, they will tell you where you went wrong, might get mad with you a little bit, apologize for you if needed, they will always and forever be fighting for you.

4. Family is family. 

They will accept you no matter what – your past, your present, and your future. No matter how martyr you are in loving, no matter how irritating you are because you don’t listen to everyone when you love, no matter how blind you are in your decisions, and no matter how much you care to try even after so many failures. They will always be by your side through it all. You will always be a part of the family and it will be disabled without you.

5. Your parents are God-given. 

God speaks to you through the people He put in your life. He gave them to you, arranged and placed them in your life so you can have the best navigators, guides, co-captain in becoming the best you can be; the YOU He has imagined, planned, and destined you to be. Know that through the way your parents love you, care for you, and cherish you is God’s way of showing how much He loves you through them. Value them with everything you are because they deserve it.

So much love for all the parents in the world! 🙌🏻

PS,

#LetDad&MomKnow

 

 

19/365 – Get Married At Barasoain Church

At the age of 25, I plan to (or I should) get married to the right person destined for me and I’m already preparing and considering every little detail for my perfect wedding 4 years from now. For some, 25 is a little bit early but for others it’s just the perfect time. I know God has planned everything in His perfect timing but I’m with the others. It may or may not come when I’m already 25 but it’s always good to have plans for the future so you have something to look forward to.

Of course, one of the first things to consider (other than when) is where. Barasoain Church is in Bulacan and it’s far from the South – probably 4 hours travel time via public transportation. It was my first time to get inside the church and that was when I became a believer of love at first sight.

Vintage historical places like Barasoain Church always take your breath away by bringing you back to when it was brought to life, its prime era, its story for which your heart will be able to translate such powerful emotions. 

Oh look at that exquisite interior! I’m an everything-floral girl and I instantly fell inlove with the carefully painted flower patterns on the ceiling. And that chandelier! Perfect to crown the precious moments of all the brides who would walk from that doorstep. 

I didn’t get a chance to take an image of the isle going to the alta because there was an on-going mass that time. Took only a photo at this angle where we were sitting during the baptismal mass.

Barasoain Church slayed my future wedding motiff – vintage and floral; Definitely a must-visit Church in the Philippines & must-venue for perfect weddings. 

14/365 – 10 MINUS 21 (THINGS I DID BEFORE I TURNED 21) : HAVE SUPER FRIENDS

Have Super Best Friends

Life is much more tolerable when you have great set of friends – people who accept just the way you are; people who love you even more when they saw your worst; people who never give up on you and never tire to carry you when you can’t even stand up.

Friendships like these are one of the true treasures in life so I make sure I keep them in my life. Our relationships are so intact that we even when we don’t talk so much, we still know and feel whenever we need each other. The timing is always precise.

Let me introduce you my best friends: Jed, Angel, and Audry.

I bet your best friend posseses one of the personas of my bestfriends – or even a epiphany of the three! 

Three Personas of My Three Best Friends:

1.The Love Guru / Love Expert Bestie – He knows it all – may it be dealing with a break-up, playing and plotting a revenge for a fuccboi, making someone fall in love with you, how-to’s on how to put-off personalities in a relationship to make him go crazy for you, or just even casual flirting with someone cute in class. He literally will tell you the step-by-step process. He would even be the one to play the role for you (he replied for me during a break-up conversation! crazy guy!).

The unlucky me always ended up with someone who’s just gonna play my heart. They always seem like good guys at the getting-to-know period and will do crazy sweet things to make you fall hard (ganyan ‘yang mga yan! laging pa-fall!). Before you know it, they’re already getting outta your life. Yes, always the story of my love life. When things start to fall apart, I always run to him. He never tires to listen to all of my katangahan in love and still keeps on reminding me lessons he already taught me even for the nth time (he knows I’m super stubborn heh heh – wala e, mahal ko e!).

He’s also that one person in my life to whom guys instantly get jealous of and he always takes advantage of it to show he’s gonna stay in your life while they won’t. Yeah, guess it’s just one of his best friend duties because it scares away dicks like some guys.

2. The Sister-from-Another-Mother Bestie – She’s literally you in all ways – a clone of all sorts. You like the same clothes, like the same shoes, like the same dramas, like the same activities, like the same guy (just kidding, she has higher standards compare to mine).  She loves to do the things you most love to do. You’re always with her in all the craziest and stupidest things you ever did and she surely will be who you are with when you think about doing it all over again.

She dresses you up. She chooses your clothes for you. She’s your fashion guru/make-up artist/hairdresser in one bestie. Her opinion is the only opinion you trust when it comes to putting that sexy picture on social media or not – if it’s too slutty or just good girl image type. She’s also the decider of which filter you’d use for your pictures to obtain that dope IG feed. She will promote and brag about you being her best best friend to everyone she knows. She’s just purely so proud of your friendship.

She’s the bitch side of you. She will bring down any bitch better than you ever will. She will burn literally every human being who tries to do any harm on you. Your life won’t be complete without her bitching on you.

3. The I’ll Lift You Up (Kahit Gaano Ka Kabigat) Bestie – She has bigger dreams than you and encourages your inner Goddess to come out. She can also be your bible-verse- reference Bestie because she can give you the beautiful verses you’ve never heard before. Even though she’s very busy in her personal life, she would take time to listen to your stories, give you advices (with bible verses), and cheer you up ’til you feel so much better.

She’s also the Mommy ng Barkada. She always thinks about everyone before herself. Her bag usually contains 2 of everything because a friend might need an extra tissue or borrow a pen. She cares for you pike your mom does – knowing what you need before you ask for it. She knows what to say every time you reach out to her. She has thevpower to always lift you up whatever situation you are in.

She did so much for me when my faith became doubtful after so many painful break-ups and personal problems – she kept on telling and reminding me things I almost forgot. She influenced me with her strong faith in God that I became more active in pursuing to know and love God no matter what.

Even when they all have different personas, they all have a common role in my life and they are doing an excellent job at it. Our years of friendship is the ultimate proof of their never-ending and unconditional love for the crazy me! They are there in happy, crazy, wild times and they will be there for me when the going gets rough.Our relationships keep on growing strong with the love and trust we entrusted each other to cherish until after death.

So much love for all the Besties in the world! ❤️

10/365 – To All the Boys Out There

Don’t love her because she’s pretty. Love her because you see her pure and kind heart which gives love to everything and everyone unrelentlessly. 

Don’t love her because she has a beautiful smile. Love her because she makes you laugh with every word she speaks. Love her because she makes your world a happy place. 

Don’t love her because she has the perfect body. Love her because she always put everyone first before herself. Love her because she takes care of you with all of her strength just to make sure you’re always fine. 

Don’t love her because everyone fancies her and you’re the one she chooses. Love her because she lets you in her life to be with her in every passing moment. Love her because she trusts that you will take care of her heart and never do what the others did. 

Don’t love her because she loves and gives you everything she ever is. Love her because she deserves to be loved more than she loves you. 

9/365 – Number 5 / 1:37am 

God knows I’m trying

To forget everything about you.

God knows I’m struggling 

To mend the damages when you torn my heart into two. 

God knows I’m willing 

To do whatever it takes to erase every memory of you. 

God knows I’m wanting 

To get rid of the whys and the hows 

That still lingers on my mind and now I’m wondering 

How well it would be If I’m able to. 

5/365 – 10 minus 21 (Things I did before I turned 21) : Cutting My Hair

Tried a new hairstyle

Hair is the crowning glory of every woman. I kept mine as healthy and as long as it could ever be for 2 straight years. Its length reached the bottom of my buttocks and I was really really proud of it that I whip it back and forth every time. Just kidding, heh heh. But I was really proud of it – even though I grew (and is still growing) fatter or even when my face was super oily or my kilay was not on flick anymore – it didn’t matter. So long as I had my mermaid hair, I felt beautiful. I avoided any salons during those 2 long years and I never even bothered going in to one of those. I didn’t really saved money because I was home-serviced by my hairstylist for my semi-annual Brazilian Blowout Keratin Treatment.

I loved this hair as much as my life but I decided to donate it to cancer patients because I know they need it more. Giving what you love is always more than giving anything monetary. I should be giving it but I forgot that they needed untouched hair and everyone knows my hair is not virgin anymore. Sadlyf – and so my plan failed as easy as that. Hay…

But that one day when I was with a special friend hanging out over pizza and soda changed my mind: an idea came up my mind; It was immediate and shocking but I was brave enough to drag him to bring me to a salon in Glorietta. No hesitations. I just did it. There’s no use of it anymore, better cut the bullshits away, this was what I thought. And there we were.. I was there.. sitting on that odd chair you only found at salons.. wrapped in white cloth and the hairstylist was ready to cut my hair. I didn’t think about anything at that moment. I was even brave enough to tell the hairstylist to ‘Surprise me’ when she was asking what to do with my hair. Hah Hah. I just felt I needed to get away from something hindering me and move to being a better self. I felt I needed to do anything just to keep moving forward – to a new and greatest Elli in 2017.

Is this what turning 21 means? Brave & Bolder me?’I wasn’t really paying attention when she cut my hair but to my surprise, I really like my hair now. 🙂 I look different in a very modest way; Someone who would tell someone the lyrics of Little Mix’s Song (the soundtrack of my life, char).

Thanks Ms. Meg @ Vivere Salon, you did a greatjob.

Vivere Salon / Prices

4/365 – 10 MINUS 21 (THINGS I DID BEFORE I TURNED 21) : GETTING MY OWN SAVINGS ACCOUNT

Getting My Own Savings Account

Investments should be done when you still don’t have any responsibilities. NOW is the time to do so. I got mine when I was still in College and I still use it up to this day. I know banks in the Philippines give Junior Savings account if you’re 18 years old and below but I really pushed my way to get a real Savings Account (because the design seems more tolerable than the Junior one, heh heh RT much). Since I belong to the working class now, this is where I keep my savings especially from 52 week challenge; my own 8 week challenge and; 500 challenge.

  • 52 week Challenge 

52-wk-sample

This is an example of the 52 week challenge you can do on your own. You can settle with whatever is best comfortable with you. If you’re just starting on your work and your salary isn’t that high enough yet then you can just match it with just saving Php5.00 or Php10.00/ week. Just don’t forget to set it aside every week. 🙂

  • 8 week Challenge

For this, I am saving 250/cut-off because I’m saving up to open a COL Financial account for Stocks. I want to start investing as early as today so I will have ample time to save up for my future. You can also set aside a portion of your Salary or Monthly allowance for something you want to buy or invest in beside the 52 week challenge.

  • 500 Challenge

I also set aside Php500.00 every pay day for my investments in the future e.g. a house, or a car, or another degree. I just see to it that I save something for myself for future use.

I try to save as much as I can especially this time of my life because this is really the perfect time to save up so your future self and family won’t suffer. You will always be financially independent – never worrying for the future of your family or never limiting yourself in helping others as much as you want to because you have the resources.

PS. Don’t starve yourself in saving, just take what blessing is enough for you. Bes, di lahat sa’yo. Char-mander. Also, don’t stress yourself up – choose whatever plan you’re best comfortable in doing. Just enjoy the fulfillment of saving. 🙂

2/365 – Number 4/ 11:37/ January 2

How can I forget?

The way your eyes looked at me

When mine were blurred by tears

The way your lips were sealed

You don’t feel it anymore

Saying the words which caressed me

No I guess I won’t be hearing it anymore

Oh, I can still feel it all, I’m still struck so deeply

All of what it made me feel, I remember

The way your body shifted away in time

And there goes all my fears

Happening before my eyes, I’m weak

I told you I’m weak; I guess you didn’t hear

When I revealed my naked self in your eyes, did you see?

Did you? Did you feel my love, dear?

In that secluded place, I breathe

Through your love, I live; felt like a heap but it was all I need

Your hands don’t feel right when they found me near

It’s not the same anymore; the feeling

We shared was now burned; I’m screaming but there’s nothing you can hear

It was not mine to hold anymore; your heart

Which I embraced to protect with all of me

No it’s not mine anymore.

0/365 My Farewell to You, 2016

Thank you for the people who chose to stay for another year in my life. They are truly one of the best gifts of life. Thank you also for giving me strength to let go of people who wished to go away. I know the spaces they left behind are really meant for special people coming in my life.

Thank you for making my dreams come true. Thank you for the awesome gift of gaining my first milestone – graduating from College. Thank you for giving me my second milestone (abruptly after my first) – my dream job at my dream company. It was all worth the sacrifices. Thank you for the opportunity to be more blessed so I can help more. Thank you for enriching a giving heart on me. I can give more than what I could when I was still in College and it really warms up my heart to be able to give to those who are in need. It feels a lot better to give than to receive.

Thank you for always bringing me and my family closer than we ever had. We share a deeper bond now and I’m so glad I can share everything with them. Never thought my parents would be the best love gurus I will ever have. Thank you for the ever-growing relationship with God through The Feast PICC and Bro. Bo Sanchez.

Thank you for taking out the trash I gained this year and leaving so much space for positivity and self-love. Thank you for the pain, hurt, and heartbreak – it has taught me to be strong, to love even when it hurts, to stand firm even when I had no strength to even keep my feet firm on the ground, to know my true worth through countless time of being degraded by overflowing words, but most especially: thank you for teaching me how to love myself more to walk away from people which were intoxicating & unnecessary in my life. Thank you for still saving me from my mistakes. Despite all this, you still brought me a year of happiness, learnings, and positivity (even on the darkest days) because you have given me the best, never-failing, and perfect love there is: God’s love.

It was hell of a year but I’m glad it all happened.

Thank you for the adventures, 2016! 

Farewell.