Yuppie Diaries: What to do after Graduation

It has been exactly 1 year after I graduated; 365 days after my so-called “Big Day”. It was the biggest achievement I could ever be proud of back then. Para sakin, may napatunayan na ako. Well, for all kinds of families, it was just the start.. (of hell).

You don’t know real pagod (exhaustion) until you have that monthly KPI with 95 as the passing grade but all the delays will be against you. You don’t know real stress when all the living things in your office pressure you – yes, kahit pati plants (even the plants) and the shoppaholic rat that comes after stealing your things. The transition to undergrad to working gurl real quick was a big blow for me. It was exciting but at the same time scary and frustrating. It’s true what they say, it’s more tiring to work than to study. At this state, I belong to the working class who always say ” if I can go back to studying, I will just study rather work. ” And I’m hella proud of it.

Saying this not to scare off all my yuppie readers but to be the Ate you never had who will guide you through the scary world you’re going to face after your G Day. 

  • Take a transition vacation. When I was graduating, some of my friends who were already working kept on advising me to take 2-3 months vacation before starting corporate life. They told me it’s gonna be hard to take a vacation again once you start. I spent almost 2 months being just a palamunin in the house after I graduated. Some people were against my actions, but I’m glad I did. It will help you realize what you really want to do in your life and the time off will really make you think about your life and excited for the next chapter you’re going to have. 

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  • Apply for work but don’t stress. Apply still for work. That time off won’t require you to be always outside party-ing. There will be lots and lots of tambay days and that is when you should pass your resumes. Spend atleast 3 hrs a day just sending resumes and applying to companies online so you are still on-track. Sayang degree bes kung di mo magagamit sa corporate kahit 2 years lang.  

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  • Prioritize your interviews. You have all the time to go to the beach sunbathing or being a couch-potato managing to finish 5 episodes per day of Kdrama but if someone calls you for an interview — don’t miss it. Even if it’s not the company you’re aiming for, still go to the interview. Not only will you have the chance to gain connections from those companies, but you can also practice what and how to answer to interviews so when your desired company calls, you surely are ready to kill it.

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  • Sleep. Sleep more than most! Trust me when I say you won’t be able to catch enough sleep when you start working — even when you try hard. Even when your future workplace is just minutes away from your house. It will not secure you a goodnight’s sleep. I didn’t get enough and still not getting enough sleep even when I just have to cross the street to get to the office. Take all the chances to sleep all day sleep all night – you will be missing it when you start working.  

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  • Keep your stand. Don’t be intimated by your colleagues posting about their 1st payday, payday treat to self, paycheck, workday, work work work status. Don’t mind them. Remember, you’re the upper hand because you’re still on your vacation mode. Take your time. Enjoy the momentum. Good things will happen, you just have to be ready when the opportunity comes. 

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Congratulations to all graduates of 2017. You are now officially unemployed on vacation mode. Enjoy the best of it and hoping for your success in finding your dream job in your dream company soon!

Best,

Elli

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57/365 – One Day A Teacher

First, I am not a teacher. For my babies (readers), you all know that I major in Business Operations Management and being a teacher has never ever collided paths with my dream board. I appreciate all the teachers and professors I ever encountered in my life but I never had a full or even a little understanding of what they actually do — until my Dad became one. My Dad always aspired to educate the young minds of the Filipino people and now that his kids are growing, he has all the time in his hands. He became a professor at his age now – 49 years old. Better be late then never! I always admire his courage to persevere and pursue whatever he dreams of. I am proud he is finally doing what he actually wants to do in life.

On the other hand, he still needs to provide for us so he can’t let go of his current job – the reason why he’s doing his passion of teaching part-time. Since I am the only offspring around and also the only offspring to have much time, I am obliged (and payed) to do some of his school works — specifically checking papers (I’m actually just taking a break from checking -heh heh). This is where I gained full appreciation of all the teachers everywhere. It is not a joke what they do. We should really not take them for granted. Hell, they do more than facing you and teaching!

  • They have to stay up all night just to check all your papers
  • They have to balance their time to teach you in every way they know.
  • They have to convince themselves that it is not their fault that you did not review for your exams
  • They have to control their tears while they read your answers – which far from the lesson he discussed over and over again – maybe farther from Earth than Pluto!
  • They have to teach you the lesson one more time again even when you seem not to listen.
  • They have to face your parents – do you know how scary and frustrating it is!?
  • They have to control their anger and hurt when you bully and talk things behind their back.
  • They have to shoulder accusations even when the one to be accused is you yourself.

Speaking on the side of the teacher all over the world. I was once a student and I’m thankful I respected all of them – even the most terror ones.

 

53/365 – Becoming Friends with Ex After Break Up

Someone told me, “being friends with your ex will actually help you move on.” 

I wondered and considered every reason there is before concluding a response. 

My ex kept on pursuing to be friends with me some days after we broke up like nothing happened. It kinda felt overwhelming but I didn’t want it to continue any further. I brushed him off the second time he invited me to join him in a friendly date because it made no sense at all. Here are the definite reasons why: 

1. He hurt me once and he will definitely hurt me again. He had the guts to leave me despite everything I and my family did for him, so why take the chance of giving him the honor to do it the second time around? 

2. He had me at my very best and he chose to still break me apart. Yep, he had me at my glorious moments and I always strived to give him the best of me. Why would 

3. He lied. He told me so many excuses and reasons why he wanted leave yet I already knew and felt the true reason behind. I don’t want to go through the deep path of recovering myself from blaming and discriminating myself of why we broke up – yet it wasn’t really because of me; he made me think it was because of me by telling me this and that reason. I wish he just told me the truth. 

3. He broke my heart. Why would I want to go through that again? 

So, my response is: Nah, it will just make things complicated for the both of you. 

Maybe it can work when you two have overcome the pains of your break-up, or have genuinely moved on – take up a year or two before you can be friends with each other without any hard feelings at all. This I know, I have atleast 3 Exes I talk to again. It took some years though before we became friends again. 

So yeah. Just don’t && tell your ex to just stay the fries off. 

52/365 – 11 Ways on How to Avoid #BestieZoned

1. Don’t call him/her bes, besh, beshie, besticles, bestie, bff, sisterette. 

2. If he/she tells you about someone special don’t act as if you’re not affected. Baka magtuloy tuloy yan at maging “secret files” ka nalang. 

3. Ask for a proper date. Not play date; not a friendly date, not tambay tayo saglit. A legit date. 

4. Be there for him/her but not always. Give him/her time to miss you kahit very very light lang. 

5. Be honest on how you really feel about the person so it will be clear. ‘Pag iniwasan ka odi move to the next target. Char! Accept defeat, friend. 

6. Define The Relationship. 

7. Set a proper time and proper mood to ask about your role in his/her life. Mabuti nang clear ano. 

8. ‘Wag mahihiyang magtanong… about everything you want to ask just to make it clear. 

9. If you intend to make ligaw na, ask properly. Not you’re already exerting effort but she doesn’t even know you’re courting her. 

10. After several times of asking numerous questions just to make it clear and it isn’t still, then walk away. You deserve someone who genuinely wants you in his life. 

11. Accept reality, cherish everything. Enjoy life, enjoy the moments. Success or failure, just be thankful of all the good times you get to spend with the person.
Kaway kaway sa mga na-#BestieZoned na paulit-ulit!! Darating din ang tamang tao para satin!✌🏻

49/365 – I’m not the Same Girl and It’s Okay.

I’m not the same clueless little baby sleeping as hours go by, innocent about what life has to offer her; not the same clueless little baby whose safe place is in the arms of her Mom and Dad. I don’t hunger only for food anymore. Milk and water aren’t the only things I’m thirsty for. I can’t cry when problems eat me alive and Mom and Dad will come rushing solving everything. No, I’m different now.

I’m not the same little happy child who worries about which doll to play first or which sweets to pick during Halloween’s. I don’t have the same youthful spirit; the same jolly laughter I can burst out every time. I can’t be careless because wounded knees aren’t the only things to worry about when you fall. It hurts more when friends come and go. I can’t say they’re come running back to me because I have the coolest toys anymore. I can’t expect things to be fixed at the end of the day because Mom & Dad will be there to take care of things. No, I’m different now.

I’m not the same teenage girl who only worries about her academics and if Mom and Dad would be glad with my scores this grading. I’m not the same teenage girl who has time to just lay around gushing and crushing over this boy and that boy. I’m not afraid to show my feelings anymore because I know they won’t like me back. I’m not afraid of losing friends because we don’t talk everyday. I’m not the same teenage girl who worries about her pimples, or her uneven skin tone, or her love handles, or her thigh gap that won’t show. I don’t need to befriend anyone just to feel accepted. No, I’m different now.

But it’s okay because at this point of life, I’ve realized the true value of life. I’ve seen enough ups and downs to know that God puts you through downs so you can learn and prepare for your better ups – the plans he anointed to happen in your life. I’ve gained so many precious friendships to know that God gives you the best people so He can show you how much He loves you through how they love you even in your worst state. I’ve been through enough relationships to know that it is noble to love without any hesitations; to love even when the one reason why you’re still holding on seems to fade every time you prove it to yourself; to love without any conditions; to love even when you begin to lose yourself; to love just like how God loves. I’ve been through enough moments in life to know how to cherish and appreciate everything everyday. Life is indeed short to waste thinking about what isn’t it. I’m different now.

4/365 – 10 MINUS 21 (THINGS I DID BEFORE I TURNED 21) : GETTING MY OWN SAVINGS ACCOUNT

Getting My Own Savings Account

Investments should be done when you still don’t have any responsibilities. NOW is the time to do so. I got mine when I was still in College and I still use it up to this day. I know banks in the Philippines give Junior Savings account if you’re 18 years old and below but I really pushed my way to get a real Savings Account (because the design seems more tolerable than the Junior one, heh heh RT much). Since I belong to the working class now, this is where I keep my savings especially from 52 week challenge; my own 8 week challenge and; 500 challenge.

  • 52 week Challenge 

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This is an example of the 52 week challenge you can do on your own. You can settle with whatever is best comfortable with you. If you’re just starting on your work and your salary isn’t that high enough yet then you can just match it with just saving Php5.00 or Php10.00/ week. Just don’t forget to set it aside every week. 🙂

  • 8 week Challenge

For this, I am saving 250/cut-off because I’m saving up to open a COL Financial account for Stocks. I want to start investing as early as today so I will have ample time to save up for my future. You can also set aside a portion of your Salary or Monthly allowance for something you want to buy or invest in beside the 52 week challenge.

  • 500 Challenge

I also set aside Php500.00 every pay day for my investments in the future e.g. a house, or a car, or another degree. I just see to it that I save something for myself for future use.

I try to save as much as I can especially this time of my life because this is really the perfect time to save up so your future self and family won’t suffer. You will always be financially independent – never worrying for the future of your family or never limiting yourself in helping others as much as you want to because you have the resources.

PS. Don’t starve yourself in saving, just take what blessing is enough for you. Bes, di lahat sa’yo. Char-mander. Also, don’t stress yourself up – choose whatever plan you’re best comfortable in doing. Just enjoy the fulfillment of saving. 🙂

1/ 365 – 5 Tips I would advice my 2016 Self

Hi 2016 Self – we’ve been through a lot and it has shaped us in ways we don’t know possible. We’ve been through ups that created us new memories we can add into our life line and downs which made us forget how wonderful life is. Still, we’re here and we’re moving forward. That’s what’s important, right? Learning to accept and continue life as we know it. These are my words to you and all the beautiful ladies out there who will have the courage to carry on their life despite every circumstances that tried to bring them down.

  1. Don’t settle for anything less than what you originally wanted. Be firm with your non-negotiables. Don’t settle for silver when you wanted gold. Don’t settle with pwede na. Babe, don’t degrade your standards just because someone gives some shit for you. That’s just trash compare to what should be truly yours. You are ever worthy of whatever you aspire for, so make it happen.
  2. Learn to walk away. ‘Second chances, they don’t matter. People never change’ (Hayley Williams on Misery Business) Set your soft and hard limits – yes fine, it’s okay to give second chances but it should end on that. Once the deed was done, it will happen again. Trust me. Get out of that destructive relationship. Walk away with dignity – for you to not lose yourself any further. You did your job, you gave all your love, and you did everything you can to make it work. If he doesn’t appreciate it still, it’s time to pack your bags and leave.
  3. Put yourself above anyone. No, it’s not being selfish but it’s about loving yourself so much as you have loved everyone else. When you love someone, you don’t want anyone, not even a single bee, hurt them and that’s what you will also do to yourself. Appreciate your strengths and embrace your weaknesses. Love yourself more when you feel like no one does. That is when no one can ever get near to hurt you.
  4. Learn to trust God more. It really, really works. My Tita once told me I was the happiest girl experiencing break-up. Well, maybe this is the reason why. I trusted God above anyone else. I let His love to numb whatever pain I was feeling. I let His love, and only His love, to reign in my heart and soul and it worked seemingly right for me. Do it and you’ll know how wonderful it is for your broken heart to be filled and reincarnated in God’s love.
  5. Don’t give up proven & tested relationships. Spend and cherish moments with your family and best friends even when it would cause an argument between you and your partner. They were there when he wasn’t around yet; they are there through the ups and downs of your relationships and; they will be there when he breaks your heart. They will always be there for you and you should always be there for them also. These are true relationships that you can keep forever.

Time and people may change and circumstances may seem to repeat and repeat again; but with what you’ve been through, you’re different now. You’re stronger. You’re better. You’re braver. You’re much more ready for something bigger this year.

Love,

2017 self.

First Love, First Lesson : Don’t Lose Yourself

The first time I fell in love, I mean really fell in love – not just puppy love or childhood sweetheart kind of thing – oh god it was awesome. It was euphoric. It was the kind of love story I would never thought existed.

It happened in 8th grade. Everyone knew everyone. You know there’s a new student when everyone talks about the same person all the time; everybody got the eyes on that new bait. There they were – two new boys for the ladies. They were brothers but they were both placed in the 9th grade. No, there are not twins. Yep, one of them was my first love. Let’s just call him A.

A is a Fil-Arab and from that information alone, you’d guess he’s a hottie. Yes, he is. He’s got the perfect features – the big tantalizing eyes of an Arab: the fiery dark-brown pupil, the naturally-curled eyelashes, and those perfectly shaped eyebrows. They always got this look saying: “Come on, you know you want to look at me.” Everyone did. They were the talk of the town for quite some time.

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I knew they existed but they did not interest me in any way. I guess I was just not into that kind of thing. I was kind of gorgeous boy-hating because they would just bring serious heartache to anyone – they got to choose anyone anytime. Who wants that?

As uninterested as I was with A, he on the other hand noticed me. He’d always do small things for me to notice him but I never looked at him. He always walked in front of me hoping I would look up but I never did. For quite some time, he was looking for a way to get to me. He made one of his classmates come up and ask for my number but he did not text me after three days. I guess he was going with the “I want you so much but you have to have no idea how much” technique.

I bet you know Twilight Saga, right? Don’t hate. I hate the characters in the story – I hate how corny and unreal they are – but the love side is what’s keeping me very much into it. Edward Cullen would do literally anything to keep Bella alive. Bella’s heart will always belong to Edward. There was nothing that can separate them.

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It was like that. It was nostalgic. It was too good for me. I felt like I had everything in the world. He gave me everything he ever had and I gave him mine. Everyone was envious of our love story. Everyone thought how perfect it was and why it wasn’t happening to them. It went on like that for months.

But I was blinded by the perfection of it that I didn’t see me losing my own self.

He redeemed himself by consuming whatever was left of me. I was living with the little love he gave me because he left me empty. That that perfection everyone saw hid the destruction he was doing to me.

Yes, it took the destruction of me to know that loving him made me lose myself in the process.

It was really painful when it ended. I cried for weeks and it took a lot of tough love from my best friend to regain myself. For the record, he was the one who broke up with me. His break up speech was him being a drug to me, that me being with him forbade me to be happy. True enough he was, but I was too stupid to want him back. We didn’t get back together and we don’t talk much to this day but we had closure.

Everyone longs for the perfect first relationship; the first and last. If I had the wisdom back then, I would’ve not chosen A. I would have chosen different or I might have just waited for someone else to come along. But I’m still grateful for my choices because I wouldn’t have gained the wisdom I have now if not from what I’ve experienced from him.

Who was your first love?

What was it like?

What was your first lesson in love?

I’d love to know! 🙂

PS. Twilight Saga references because we both liked Twilight Saga and he really looks like Edward Cullen except more Arab-y. 😉